Sunday, April 1, 2012

Kryptonite Rawhide

This last winter Red Dog got what we thought was a nice surprise.  The Gentry kids (who are a cool bunch of house apes) had been reading about Red Dogs adventure on Facebook. So while shopping one afternoon they saw this giant three foot long rawhide chew bone at the pet store.  The kids thought it was something Red Dog could use and bought it for him out of the kindness of their hearts.  It just so happened that we ran into the Gentry's at a popular local BBQ restaurant known as "Smokey Bros" before the kids could get the chew bone delivered to the house.  The kids brought the unwrapped gift inside so there was no doubt what it was.  This thing was ginormous.  I've never seen a chew bone that big in my entire life and I'm positive Red Dog hasn't  unless he's stumble across an old cattle carcass while living on the ranch.  I got tickled as they gave me the gift.  Many of the customers were looking at this chew bone like "I didn't see that on the menu".  I often wondered if anyone grabbed a menu to see if it was listed.  So we finished our meal and I carried the huge bone out of the restaurant like a cave man carrying a leftover leg bone.  I had a sudden urge to yell "YABBA DABBA DOO" as I walked out the door.  
When we arrived home, I walked into the house carrying Red Dogs new gift.  He greeted us at the door with his normal excitement of tail wagging but then Mega Bone caught his eye.  Those brown eyes grew to the size of a small car and locked on me with a laser beam stare.  I am almost sure he was hearing angels singing in his head.  I laid it on the floor and he began to eagerly examine his new gift.  After studying it for several minutes he looked up at me as if to say "how do I get a dinosaur bone in my mouth".  This look caught me off guard considering the fact that just a few days after Red Dog moved in last year he inhaled three large beef ribs off of my supper plate in the blink of an eye without even leaving a grease trail.  So Debbie picked up the chew bone and gave it to him.  Red Dog stood with his head wobbling from side to side desperately trying to balance the bone in his mouth like an Olympic Weight Lifter trying to balance a five hundred pound bar bell.  He held on as long as he could and finally dropped it on the wood floor causing a loud WHAPP!!!!  Red Dog tucked his tail and ran to closet with the speed of a gazelle running for his life.  Debbie and I just had to laugh then it dawned on me, "Great, now all it will take to rob us blind is for a thief to throw a piece of raw hide on the floor".  After a few minutes, I was able to lure him out of the closet. It then hit me that even Superman was defenseless against kryptonite and that made me feel better(I don't think Red Dog knows who Superman is so he didn't feel better).  I decided that Red Dog doesn't have to got off to Guard Dog College and I didn't have to clean up anything stinky off the floor.  It was a win-win day for both of us.  Until the next Red Dog Adventure, God bless you all.

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